What You Say Matters to Your Teen's FutureThe eye rolls when you ask about their assignments. Not respecting your house or your rules. Laughing about risky behavior. Are you at your wits' end?
As a Sociologist, Parent and Teen Relationship Coach and Substance Abuse Counselor with over 30 years of experience, I can help. I’ll show you how to influence your teenager’s decisions right now by changing the way you communicate. Get them back on track FAST!
The next stage will be here before you know it. Is your teen ready?
You can’t control your teen with punishments or consequences…
… But You Can Influence Their Behavior With Something You Have Complete Control Over: What You Say
Would you like to work together to see the light at the end of the tunnel right away? Or go at your own pace with my online course? You can also DIY with my book for teens and parents! Choose below ↓
Grab my free conflict-free conversation checklist?
Fighting about school clothes? Dirty rooms? Phone use? Zero motivation? Stop dreading talking about it with your teen by using my conflict-free conversation checklist.
You KNOW you need this →
What is Parent Coaching for Parents of Tweens and Teens?
If you’re here wondering how to change your teenager’s behavior or attitude, you might be asking yourself, “What is parent coaching?” Coaching is a process of identifying blind spots, learning new skills, and getting personal support and encouragement while you implement them. As a coach, my client is the relationship itself… not you or your teen. I focus on what the relationship needs to thrive. Often, that is an imbalance of power that never worked and is trying to persist as your child approaches adulthood.
Think of a coach like having a personal trainer at the gym if you’re trying to reach a fitness goal or a voice coach if you’re the next Bon Jovi–as a parent coach I’ll be working with you to help you reach your goals! If things start to slip, I’ll remind you why you’re doing this and what’s at stake if the relationship doesn’t improve. As a sociologist, I’m interested in the dynamics of the group and how you and your family can work together to achieve the best outcomes for everyone!
Hi! I’m Laura Lyles Reagan, MS
I Help Parents & Teens Move From Conflict to Connection That Counts For The Future
My daughters and I are close today. They’re launching in the world and I couldn’t be more proud of them. But their teen years weren’t easy, and I was fortunate to learn new ways to communicate with them early to support them as they faced real challenges.
As a Sociologist, I’ve worked in youth development and parent education for more than 30 years. My approach, called co-creation, helps teens and parents grow the skills they need to create positive relationships and get back on track. Creating happy memories together doesn’t have to be a thing of the past. Let’s talk and figure out what you need to reconnect with your teen.
I have a Masters of Science in Sociology, specializing in interactionism, communication dynamics, and the sociology of childhood and adolescence.
I’m a former instructor in the Sociology of Childhood and Adolescence at the University of Texas Rio Grande Valley.
My original research, “Dynamic Duos,” about adult mentor and parent impact on youth and teens was featured in the Journal of Applied Social Science, 2013.
My youth development career spans service in Mexico City as a youth substance abuse counselor to non-profit management in Texas.
My teen and parent coaching service has trained teens, parents, and educators nationwide. I conduct workshops on hot topics such as substance abuse, bullying prevention, and teen suicide prevention.
Why Choose Laura?
When parents and teens come to me, the teen has either shut down or overtly shuts out the parent, often through apathy or rebellion. The parent is angry because their teen is shutting them out and isn’t compliant while they harbor a fear underneath the anger that their teen won’t be able to navigate the world and become responsible and independent. And underneath that fear is a deeper one – the teen will launch as a young adult and not engage with them or talk to them about their lives. This creates a stalemate where neither parents nor teens feel respected.
That’s why I try to work with parents and teens together in session. I invite parents and teens to drop their defenses and share from the heart. Together we co-create a safe space of acceptance. We start exactly where they are with the conflict they had the very week they start working with me. I teach them how to use the conscious communication skills that few us learned as children and we use those skills to work through the issue. By making the communication the focus and not who was right and who was wrong, teens don’t feel like the identified patient and parents begin to understand how to meaningfully relate past the impasse.
Both parents and teens say they feel heard. Sometimes, they feel heard for the first time. This process becomes a road map to use the communication skills to co-create solutions together as co-equals. Parents surrender authoritarianism, learning how to walk beside their teens as a loving resource and guide while teens are empowered to become more responsible for themselves and their future.
Dr. Shefali (Oprah’s parenting guru) calls it a new relationship dynamic, conscientious co-creation. I just know it works! Parents and teens leave with a road map for co-creating a relationship that lasts while launching teens towards a positive future.
Ready to get started with coaching for parents of teens? Choose below.
Common Parent Coaching Questions
How will we meet?
I work with clients from all over the world remotely. We’ll connect by phone or Zoom session. You’ll also be able to reach me by email or messenger between our sessions.
Will coaching work with my troubled teen?
Your ability to influence comes from the way you communicate with your teen. If there are communication breakdowns, we’ll do everything we can to facilitate communication breakthroughs so you can co-create your teen’s future, together.
What parenting style do you recommend?
My method is called Parenting Sociology, but it’s most like Conscious Parenting. Through communication, you’ll identify any power imbalances in your relationship which are causing behavior issues.
Will my teenager's risky behavior stop?
We’ll work together to uncover the reason why your child is engaging in risky behavior and what they need from you to begin making better choices. My background as a substance abuse counselor, history of family alcoholism, experience as a mother, and my own recovery have enabled me to help parents turn teens who are engaged or experimenting in risky behavior around. It’s never too late!
Therapy, treatment center, or coaching - What's best for us?
Coaching can work in tandem with therapy and psychologists often refer clients to me. While therapy focuses on you or your teen, I focus on the relationship itself. Treatment centers –there are some great ones and bad ones. Some substance abuse programs for kids really save lives. But they do nothing or very little to improve the relationship between the parent and teen, because they remove the teen from the home environment and don’t work with the family system.
How long does coaching last?
Most of my clients work with me for six months to solidify their new skills and feel supported as the family’s transformation takes place. You can sign up for as many sessions you want.
Which coaching plan do I need?
Who needs to attend each session?
I work with parents, though I do work with your teen too if they’re interested and it seems warranted. I’ve never had issues with a teen not opening up to me. In my Empowered Online Learner Program, I work separately with you and your teen.
Read Why Parents Say My System Works!
“I’m so glad I found Laura! Teens and fledgling adults are in an equally delicate and stormy times in their lives. Laura offers a unique perspective in the sea of conscious parenting coaches. Her sociological approach conveys a strong hopeful message of “Co-creation” with our teens and fledgling adults. We as parents can make a positive difference to our kids (and ourselves) as they struggle to individuate.
Laura is a superb listener. She shares simple yet powerful techniques such as affirmations and I – statements geared to create and /or enhance trust and agency.
I’ve been able to apply the techniques to my teens and young adults. Thanks to Laura, our family relationships feel increasingly authentic and less drama -driven. That means more calm and confidence in ourselves and, with each other.”
“Through the years, I have searched a lot of resources to find what I have found in you. Before nothing was working. I know nothing is magic but I am building new relationships with my teens and I feel hopeful. Thank you!”
“Laura was a Godsend to me. With all I learned, I feel a sense of calm empowerment for the first time in YEARS! I even feel a sense of calm about my teens’ future. Before, I felt my life was flooded in chaos, but she helped me practice positive communication skills that conveyed my heart. I always look forward to our next session. I highly recommend her!”
Mother of Twin Daughters
“Every time I use the communication skills I learned and practiced in Laura’s course, I am humbled by how my son tunes in and hears me. And I am so grateful to truly hear him now and be reminded what a sweet spirit he has. I’m so glad I took this course and I did this work.”
Mom of Sons
“My 22 year old, my first born kissed me and told me thank you for leading by example for my brothers! So your stuff, your support, and your system works!”
Mother of Four (Two Teen Sons, Two Adult Daughters)
“I doubted myself before parent coaching with Laura. I was afraid that what I said might scar them for life because I was scared as a child. But Laura gave me a tool box to share my heart with my kids. I used the tools week by week and felt so validated when it worked. Now my kids share their lives with me! And Laura was a great sounding board for different teen scenarios.”
“Sociologist Laura Lyles Reagan champions Conscientious Co-Creation, a transformative relationship dynamic. Offering Sample Conversations as inspirational springboards, Reagan guides teens and parents to recognize their sacred, vested interest in empowering themselves and each other, to continually co-create the most mutually respectful and loving climates for communication.”
– Dr. Shefali Tsabary, Author of The Conscious Parent
Teens, I’m Here For You, Too.
As a teen, I didn’t always feel heard or understood by my family. It made me determined to learn how to have a deeper, heart-to-heart connection with my own children.
If it seems like your parent isn’t listening to you, or you’re feeling like an outcast in your own home, then I encourage you to make even the smallest choice that helps you feel empowered.
You might start by reading my book, How to Raise Respectful Parents.
I give lots of practical tips to help you communicate in a way that will encourage your parents to really listen.
You can download the first two chapters of my book free, below.
If you need more help, hop over to my Facebook page and send me a message!
I’m also here if you’d like personalized guidance with life coaching.
Online Course for Parents
Get them off their phone and stop fighting about their future.
End the entitled, selfish behavior or disrespect by learning how to communicate with your teen, step-by-step in my online course.
Turn Your Teen Around By Tuning Into Yourself
You’ll learn the Conscious Communication Skills that help you create win-wins, so your teen will want to learn with you instead of fighting you about this, too!
My research was published in the Journal of Applied Social Science in 2013.
Dynamic Duos: A Case Review of Effective Mentoring Program Evaluations
When we evaluated these programs, we saw trends in what kids perceived as the important factors for how adults impact them. Invariably, the first adults they spoke of were their parents. This was even true for our teen focus group and survey results.
Teens admire the adults in their lives (including their parents for doing the following:
1) fun activities with them,
2) teaching them a skill,
3) protecting them,
4) helping them solve problems.
5) being present in times of crisis.
Laura L. Reagan-Porras
Journal of Applied Social Science
Vol. 7, No. 2 (SEPTEMBER 2013), pp. 208-219 (12 pages)
Published By: Sage Publications, Inc.
The Journal of Applied Social Science (JASS) is the official, peer-refereed publication of the Association for Applied and Clinical Sociology (AACS). JASS reflects more than 25 years of journal sponsorship by AACS and its predecessor organizations, the Society for Applied Sociology and the Sociological Practice Association. The Journal of Applied Social Science is the direct amalgamated successor of two previously published journals: The Journal of Applied Sociology and Sociological Practice: A Journal of Applied and Clinical Sociology.
Latest on the Blog
Our teens bark back or try to get the last word for 2 reasons. 1) They don’t feel heard or honored. Teens get “defensive” with parents as a result. 2) They need to be different from us as parents in order to grow into independence. As parents, we can approach our teens with conscious communication. We can use I-Messages to communicate how disrespect feels and model how we would like to be spoken to.read more
Parent Overwhelm Solutions: 1) Take time to reflect more and do less to respect your own boundaries. 2) Use empowering affirmations with yourself and your teen. 3) Co-create supportive community with other parents.read more
A practice of mindfulness, helps teens find their own calm and inner wisdom which holds all the answers to the questions they pose. Mindful deep breathing and awareness centers teens, placing them in the present (not the anxious future or depressed past) and gives them the ease to regulate their emotions. Practically that means I coach teens to manageably break down their assignments, confront test anxiety and release depression.read more